Random musings of a mother gone mad

Does My To Do List Make My Butt Look Fat?

I recently made the most astonishing discovery.

This is going to change the shape of buttocks everywhere!!!

To-Do Lists are fattening!

Yes. Your To-Do List can make your butt look fat. As in…

does this make my butt look fat

to do list makes my butt look fat

It actually makes sense. Your ass is a reflection of your mind. If you’ve got a lot of shit going on in your head, your ass is going to try to get your attention. In a BIG way. And it’ll just keep getting bigger ’til you finally pay attention.

It’s your body’s way of squealing on your mind. Your body really doesn’t like being messed with.

Your To-Do List is a snap shot of what’s actually going on in your head.

to do lists make your butt look fat

Whoa! I’m no electrician but those wires look dangerous. 

And by the way: how many items on that To-Do List do you actually WANT to do? Because THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS “HAVE TO DO” ANYTHING. 

but but but

Yes, I know, my little Poppet.

This should be GOOD news! You don’t have to do anything.

You don’t. I repeat:

You simply do not HAVE TO do ANYTHING. Nobody can MAKE you do anything. You are not a child. You are an adult.

You get to choose EVERYTHING.

And if you insist on fighting me on this I am going to have to come over there and kick you in the shins REALLY HARD!!!!

YOU GET TO CHOOSE EVERYTHING, including what you BELIEVE.

A belief is not a fact.

BELIEF: I have to do everything  

FACT:  I don’t have to do anything. Ever. 

Now what? Do you still want to hold onto that belief? Because it’s not working for you. In fact, it’s actually hurting you. And look what it’s doing to your ass!!!

The belief that you “have to do everything” makes your butt fat because the belief makes you feel bad (frustrated? angry? resentful?) and so you procrastinate, but you still feel yucky and you don’t want to, but that list is staring at you, and you HATE it and you just want all those crazy wires out of your head so you can have some PEACE AND QUIET IN THERE.

And so… you EAT.

And then you CRY.

And then you repEAT.

See how this works?

Cry + Eat + RepEAT = Pumpkin Butt

Put that list down Poppet. Untangle those wires in your head. Rest.

And then decide what it is you WANT to do on that list. From a place of wanting, truly WANTING — that’s the only way to do anything.

Let me know what you BELIEVE in the comments below.

*******Hey… if you want to learn how to re-wire your brain so that you can shrink your Pumpkin Butt, get your Pumpkin ass in THIS CLASS! 

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